Good evening, good morning, good afternoon.
Wherever you may be reading this from, I thank you for your time.
It is with a heavy heart that I must write this journal entry following the status update of the same name, but whilst my own heart might be heavy, I pray that yours will not be as this is not as bleak a time as you might at first believe.
Recently, ChainALM, formerly Chain O'Muircheartach aka Chain O'Mac had gone through some abrupt changes. Changes that had brought it to this point, and this post.
I've been using this account for 8 years now.
8 years of cosplay photos, holiday photos, RP ideas, fanfics and songs, bad drawings, fantastic artwork by others for projects I was involved in and the occasional journal.
But lately I've hit a snag. About two months ago, my depression reared its head after laying dormant for about four years. The last two months have been the worst its ever been, a compilation of real world issues alongside mental and physical health issues. Add to that, my own stubbornness to talk to anybody because they seemed to be having the time of their lives and I didn't want to drag them down, another because I refuse to use them as a crutch any more, and another because I lost them. I won't go into the details, but asking for help is something I've never been good at, even if I'm usually the first to throw myself into the problems of others and want to help them solve said problems.
This recent sickness has killed a lot of things though. My creativity has taken a nose dive, all I want to do is sleep, I eat maybe once a day, if even, my motivation to do anything is at an all time low (unless I'm playing Splatoon on my YouTube channel) and feel like I've put on the Emperor's New Clothes on social media, attempting to keep a certain type of person alive in the minds of those who only see me at literal face value. But that person is dead. That part of me right now is buried under a litany of anger, distrust and scattered memories. So I need to go away for a while.
ChainALM as a content provider is dead. ChainALM as a username is dead, if not dying as I scrub it from social media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr etc; stabbed in the back and left to fall down a bit before I as a person lose my damn mind.
If/When I come back, it will be with a new username and hopefully a new motivation to put things out there better than before.
I'm just happy that my last upload to this account is a happy one.
This has been a long time coming; ChainALM isn't even really a username I identify with anymore. The reasoning behind that choice of handle sort of slipped through my fingers, and I just don't have the same sort of fondness for it. Recent issues or goings on have just pushed the need for this to happen now.
I apologize to anybody that this upsets, though I can't imagine that's many as I don't exactly have the biggest audience.
But, please understand, I'm doing this for a good reason. And thank you for all the favs, comments, subscriptions.
Til we meet again, one last time
Love and Peace.